Movie Taglines

Article by James
After my last blog re the bomb-tastic Creature, I got to thinking about movie taglines. You know the line they use in film advertising to try and get your interest. And after much thought, and then research, there have been some legendary, some hilarious, and some completely bizarre. Unfortunately there are those just utterly stupid, and must have been left to a work-experience-teen to come up with. Like Creature. “Terror Has Teeth” is the tagline. Don’t most monsters? I’ve personally never heard of a monster that sucks their victims to death. Maybe you have? Let us know.

Anyway, first off the rank for me, which has to be the BEST ever tagline, is from 1979’s Alien – “In Space, no one can hear you Scream”. How great is that? Re memorable, there is also 1986’s Poltergeist 2: The Other Side with “They’re Back”, 1998’s The Truman Show with “On the Air. Unaware”, and another Alien film with 1992’s Alien 3 – “The Bitch is Back”.

 Here’s a few more that made me laugh, made me nod in approval, or simply made me think there are some off-kilter people out there in advertising.

–          1986’s legendary Ferris Bueller’s Day Off  – “One man’s struggle to take it easy”. Cool.

–          1997’s Gattaca – “There is no gene for the human spirit”. Classy.

–          1994’s Naked Gun 33 1/3: The Final Insult – “From the brother of the producer of Ghost”. Hilarious.

–          2004’s Gladiatress – “Does my gluteus maximus look big in this?”. Ha,ha,ha…. Ok, it’s trashy but fun.

–          1986’s The Fly – “Be afraid. Be very Afraid.” Cool.

–          1998’s There’s Something About Mary – “Love is in the Hair”. Ha,ha,ha.

–          Tim Burton’s 1990 fantasy, Edward Scissorhands – “His story will touch you, even though he can’t”. How ridiculous is that???? And is it just me, or does it
          come across as slightly perverted?

 Lastly, I’d like to say that 2011 has truly had some crapola taglines. Two in particular. First we have Kung Fu Panda 2 with “Prepare for the Return of Awesomeness”. Zzzzzzzzzzz. But the 2nd, which is possibly one of the worst of all time, is from the horrible Smurfs movie that has recently been released with that bubble-headed-pop-strumpet voicing Smurfette – Katy Perry. The tagline is “Smurf Happens”. Are you serious?

 Whoever wrote that, no, whoever signed off on that, needs to find a new profession.

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